This is going to be a lengthy story, as it spans the course of a year ,I believe ,if my memory serves me correctly.But it doesn't end with the incidents of this year. It can be verified through records held in the Cleveland County Courthouse(motions,court minutes..etc.), records(I never received my copies and what they did send was heavily blacked out. Of course , I did get a letter from Janet Reno ) kept at the FBI that I instigated under the Omnibus Crime Law, the Roman Catholic Church( as a result of the assistance I received ) and who knows who else, as these things were not done in secret. It can not be written in one day, so this will be an evolving document, so in time , material will be added to continue the story.
1991.
My wife and kids and I arrived in Oklahoma due to the availability of my wife's family and the fact that Tinker Air force Base was minutes from where her aunt and uncle lived.This was necessary and convenient for the birth of our daughter , Elena Roxanne at Tinker. The military had Bekins Moving and Storage transfer our personal and household goods and place them in storage in Houston, where we thought we were going to move and live .
As a result of difficulties and stresses we encountered in Houston , we both agreed that, until the birth of Elena it would be wise for her to be around family, so we went to OKC.
Let me get to the meat of the title and then weave in and out ...
1992
After the events of the day I was ready for some peace. But it was not to occur. While looking out the window of my apartment I noticed that Carl Todd Russell and David Brown were walking next to my building.My motorcycle was parked at the end of my stairs leading to my upstairs apartment. I understood,due to the inability or unwillingness of the police to protect me from the days earlier assault on my person by Carl Todd Russell( he ,with no instigation on my part, punched me in the forehead,HARD) and the repertoire he had with the police( shaking hands,slapping each other on the back...chummy ,chummy), that they were sent to instigate me. I was aware that they would attempt to cause damage to my "bike" to further instigate me, so that is the reason I had moved the bike from the parking lot to the foot of the stairs. But ,as he had assaulted me out of the blue ,I had put a stick(one of those white ,round wooden things found in newer Apartments closets to hang clothes on) in the net of my bike to fend off another attack. When I went downstairs to check on the bike,David Brown came out from underneath the stairwell and I thought we were fixing to fight. He had a smile on his face and stated that he and Carl Todd were sorry for the incident earlier in the day and to make up for it they wanted to smoke a joint with me as a peace offering. I told him that I was just baffled as to why Carl Todd had hit me in the first place but I was more than willingly to brush it under the rug, considering we were neighbors in the same apartment complex. I let him know I was going to just let my wife know were I was going. I went upstairs and told her were I would be. I noticed on the way down the stick on my bike was no longer there,so I asked David what happened to it. He said they threw it away,just to make sure there were no more problems. Good answer.As we approached the corner of his building to to turn right , he started going left . I asked him were he was going as I got to the corner and I saw the stick that had been on my bike arc and intersect with my nose full force by a swing of Carl Todd's hands. If my face had been a baseball ,it would have been a home run. I was infuriated,realizing I had been duped again. I asked him,as he threw this stick to David,"Why the Hell did you do that?" He responded something to the effect that they were going to fuck me up ." Not so tough without your sword are you?" I said, "what?" as David proceeded to pound me on top of my head with the stick. Well ,amazingly with the trauma already inflicted, I did not pass out, but instead grabbed that stick out of David 's hand and started to give him a dose of his own violence.Well, then this is when things got a little uglier.As I met the stick with David's head,Carl Todd stabbed me in the right bicep.I dropped the stick out of pained surprise. Now I knew for sure they meant to "Fuck me up!" David picked up the stick again and started to hit me. I had had enough of this and grabbed the stick out of his hands and raised it above my head with both hands and it exploded into a million splinters. Really! Like as if by magick. It surprised even me! Now David was hitting me with his fists, so I gave him a front kick right into his stomach and he exhaled "OOMPH!"I knew it really hurt him. But as my foot had connected with his stomach Carl Todd grabbed the opportunity to plunge that knife into my right thigh and pull down. He left an approximate 2-3 inch jagged gash .Son of a bitch ,now that one really hurt and it dawned on me they were not just trying to fuck me up, they were trying to kill me!! I immediately started bleeding profusely and I knew I had only minutes if not seconds to get away before I was not able to as a result of the profuse bleeding. I was pinned between them with a fence on one side and their building on one. Carl Todd continued to stab me as I rolled to the ground attempting to get away from the reach of the knife. I started losing consciousness,but I kept rolling. Now I came to the point that I was not rolling anywhere, I was just lying there. So now , they took their time with no fear . In fact I could see the pleasure they were having. At least they were happy at their work(LOL). I was on my back,when Carl told David to turn me over on my stomach, which he did.Carl then proceeded to stab me up and down my spine.Carl then told David to turn me over again and lift up my arm.He did. Carl then stabbed me in in my right(side) lung, causing a partial pneumothorax.My lung deflated. Now Carl instructed David to tilt my head back and open my mouth.Now I could tell by the look on Davids face that he was baffled. Carl actually got mad at him and threatened him and told him to do just what he told him. He tilted my head back and held my mouth open as Carl proceeded to remove from his back pocket a pint of Jack Daniels, open it, and pour it down my throat.My first thought was to give thanks to GOD for at least letting me have a good drink before I died. I know I then died.
My doberman pinscher(Liebchen) had at this time been trying to breakout of the 2nd floor apartment(this is according to Ellen) by jumping through the living room(she sensed and probably could see what was happening to me from her vantage point,as to where I wound up after rolling.) window.This had freaked Ellen out as she had no idea what was going on outside.We had just earlier got Liebchen from an Airforce member who informed us that she was an Airforce trained security dog ,but that her commands were in German.Ellen put the leash on her and the dobie literally almost yanked her arm out of Ellen's socket as she dragged her over to me. She saw me lying on the ground and covered in blood but had not realized I had been stabbed and beaten so severely. I came to then and saw an angel with anguish on her face and I heard Liebchen whimpering. I heard Ellen yell," I see you motherfuckers hiding under the stairs and don't think I don't know who you are!"With Liebchen's help, she dragged me back to our building and left me at the bottom of the stairs, cause I couldn't go any further!She went to call the police, but the sirens were already in the air.The ambulance was there before she even called the police,within 2-3 minutes according to the time she dragged me to the stairs and she walked up them. She had just got off the phone with 911 when she came down the stairs and saw the paramedics cutting all my clothes off me. She then(being a 91-c ,e-5 in the army)realized the extent of my injuries.And she was pissed that they were letting me be exposed in full nudity( a crowd was gathering ,drawn by the sirens) .
She then witnessed the police arrive and the assailants come out of the shadows and calmly walk over to the police and shake hands and hand over the knife. She said they were even laughing and slapping each other on the back.They obviously knew each other. I believe I died again. Next thing I know is the paramedics putting me in a pressure suit.I remember them trying to comfort me,telling me I was going to be okay. I think they were trying more to comfort themselves,it was horrific. And they could tell by the amount of wounds that this was not ordinary.
They stuck me in the ambulance and I heard them say ,"we're losing him!"And then , "We lost him!!" And immediately I was in the most peace I had ever felt and knew I was going home.Yes, I saw the bright light.And was going toward it, but a voice immediately said to me,"You can come home,but before you make that decision ,be aware that they will kill the children." It was no effort to decide and I found myself back in my body in the ER, coming to, hearing somebody yelling at me ,"What did you do with the stick that you attacked those men with!?" I became coherent enough to realize it was some woman cop yelling at me.
1987 William Beaumont Army Medical Center is located in El Paso , Texas, the place of my birth. I was training there through the Job partnership training act on the Pre-op/post-op ward.Sgt. Nangle was my immediate supervisor. I was attending A.A. And N.A. .Though I was not really an abuser of drugs.Yes I did smoke Pot.But not during my "sobriety. It was on a condition that my grandmother stipulated if I was to stay with her(going to treatment , not giving up pot, didn't need it at the time).No, I am not in denial. I stayed sober and clean for a total of 2 years. I did the steps. The steps showed me how to empower myself. I still believe in them for those needing to know how do what they want and live.
A.A. is where I met Ellen. She started coming to the 12:00 meeting at the arid club in her white military nurses uniform and my first immediate impression was that she was extremely sick ,in every aspect, she was extremely anorexic.Gaunt.Eyes shrunken in the sockets.Very bright bleached blond hair that was damaged due to her condition.Extremely unattractive. But she was really animated.Sgt Ray Goin (my sponsor) introduced us."Ted, I 'd like you to meet Sgt.Ellen Spicer!" After listening to me speak in a couple of meetings and ascertaining that I was not a psycho she asked me out to coffee at the Village Inn, but she was quick to point out she only had a couple of dollars(LOL).We went in her car.She was not used to it. I tried to be a friend and I was.
I was allowed to do many things on the floor at WBMAC ( Ellen also worked here on the OB/GYN/Post Partum Ward)than other CNA's were allowed . I was basically training in the capacity of a 91b. The other civilian CNA's training there( and I think I saw only 2) only filled the water jugs,emptied urinals, changed linen ... etc. I suctioned tracheotomies, cleansed halo's,inserted and D/C'd catheters, under supervision of a nurse dispensed meds,enemas(B/O), including vitals and other things(assisted in a lumbar puncture and would perform depactions, De brie wounds, repack wounds).
I ran everyday and even participated with some of the enlisted and officers in a couple of marathons by their invitation.
Ellen became a friend and I started showing her Juarez and the surrounding areas.White Sands, Ruiodoso,Las Cruces ,Carlsbad Caverns.And she enjoyed it and my company.I did not push myself on her and that attracted her. I was a gentleman. Still Am.
Ellen had flunked her Pt test again and was desperate. I started by conditioning her appetite to increase her strength. She was more at peace than when I had first met her. Rock climbing at Hueco Tanks increased her stamina. Her muscles were turning athletic. I would get her Mc Donald's on the way to work . I made sure she ate. I introduced her to the foods of El Paso and Juarez. Chico's Tacos. Abuelitas Tamales. Ciro's Flautas.Villa de Mar.She started filling out. She loved the food and the company.I was her friend. Then when she actually did PT with the Army I was there with her,side by side ,running...encouraging her. No not yelling.Being a friend.
I had promised God that if she did not kill herself, in Oklahoma during a trip up there, that I would take care of her until she was able to take care of herself and live.She had recently bought a gun and had taken it up to Oklahoma with her on the trip( I was not aware of this at the time). I was at my Grandmothers house when she called after 10 p.m. and riled my Grandmother.She wanted to know what I was doing and I told her it was late and my Grandmother was irritated that she had called so late. She apologized and said that she would never do it again and I told her it was okay ...just watch the time.We said goodbye and hung up. I went back to bed and then got the horriblest feeling.Thoughts.The gun."Ill never do it again." The extreme sadness. Death. I knew what she was going to do , so I asked God immediately with tears in my eyes, if that he would allow her to live, I would take care of her and make her well.When she came back from Oklahoma a few days later, she was so happy to see me.I was happy to see her! She confessed to me on her own that she was going to have killed herself while in Oklahoma. I asked her how? She said she was fixing to pull the trigger with the gun in her mouth but that at the last second she had not the desire to die. I asked her when this act occurred. She said a little while after she had gotten off the phone with me.She explained, that was the reason she had called, to say goodbye one last time. I told her I was glad she called and was aware that she was in mortal danger. And how I knew. And what I promised and to Who.She was so beautiful now.She glowed
That is why I was with her, running PT on base with her.
I eventually moved in with her at her request to help her with the rent and she said it would get me out of my grandmothers house. I agreed. My dad had been calling everyone in the family to pressure my grandmother to throw me out.I thanked her and accepted her offer.
Now the military took notice of these abilities and the actions. They saw Ellen's transformation within a matter of months.They saw to what extent I was willingly to go for a human being . And what change I effected.Nothing is done in secret. Especially on a military base.
Sgt. Nangle wanted to have a word in the report room with me.That's where he told me that he and Sgt. O'reilly(Reilly?), his immediate , and a few others had noticed my abilities and what I did on base and were very impressed. He asked me if I knew what CID was? Not really ,I told him. He explained that It stood for Criminal Investigation Division of the Army. I was sort of baffled.So he said flatly "we can always use someone with your proven abilities in CID." He was trying to recruit me into CID based on what they had observed at the A.A. meetings(many military attended including SSgt. Ray Goins,counselor at the ADAPC[Army alcohol drug abuse prevention and control programmpdadapc ], my interaction with Ellen(Sgt.), My interaction with the people of the hospital,my interaction in general and my ability to effect a change for the better. I told him I was not really interested. He said for me to think about it. I told him I really didn't feel like going to Basic training .I would not have to go to basic training, as I Had already proved myself, he told me. He again told me to think about it. He emphasized that they wanted me just as I was.Desperately.
The rest of this continues at Violence Revenge Forgiveness.To Read Click Here
Friday, April 25, 2008
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THINGS LEFT UNSAID
It's just a matter of time a few days ago
I saw you, you were fine
Remembering what you said
About the book you read
The one I got you
The Beginning of the End
Oh how we'd talk
For hours upon end
What I would give
Just to do it again
But you're lying there
In this hospital bed
Won't you open your eyes
And let's talk once again
If you fly away tonight
I want to tell you that I love you
I hope that you can hear me
I hope that you can feel me
If you fly away tonight
I want to tell you that I'm sorry
That I never told you
When we were face to face
Well I've been here all night
And I'm watching you
Breathe in and breathe out
Is it really you
Or just a machine
That's giving you life
And it's making it seem
That there could be hope
I could say to your face
If it weren't for you
That there would be no grace
That's covered my life
You took the time
To speak into my mind
And my heart
Words of life
So goodbye for now
And I'll see you again
Some way, somehow
When it's my time to go
to the other side
I'll hold you again
And melt at your smile
Now all I have
Are the ones that I'm with
And you taught me not
To take for granted
The time that we have
To show that we care
Speak into their minds
And their hearts
While they're here
And say I love you
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